Actually got out of bed FIRST today - yahoo! Mike is usually up for at least a couple of hours before I brush the sleep from my eyes. Typically, it takes an unexplained loud noise (for example, an explosion) or the smells of breakf...ahem...lunch to coax me out of my cocoon on those mornings that I’m not working.
Off to the lobby for a free (the very best kind) continental breakfast a la La Quinta Inn, Moab. Scrambled eggs like little alien sponges but tasty yogurt and biscuits that went down JUST fine, thanks.
I found a 50 dollar bill on the floor. A good omen! Like a good little girl (and I’m a non-believer, so no false hopes of reward in the afterlife) I took it to the front desk. A man soon approached (as I was downing my 3rd biscuit, pretending it was my first) and said “I don’t speak ze English, but thank you”. Who knew southern Utah was so, well, globalized?
2 ounces of sunscreen and a full camelback later, we put our brand new, yet-to-be-crashed tandem mountain bike on the car rack. Thank YOU DaVinci bicycles! (Can we send you the bill for future couples counseling???)
Off we go - north of Moab on 191 and take a left up 313 to Dead Horse. We are starting off on a ride deemed “beginner” by a local which suits me fine. Mike is the hard-core technical mountain biker. I’m the runner/hiker that got swept up onto the back seat. Ahhhh, love.
It’s a beautiful, cool morning and the sun slants onto the red rocks defining all the edges, curves and drops. We feel like we have all the time in the world until, literally, five SUV’s with crops of mountain bikes swinging precariously from their rear racks pull into the parking lot.
We were off like Rick Perry after the rapture. No fun having to wait behind a crowd on the trail.
A tandem just LOOKS like fun. It also looks impressive. It also turns like a freakin’ U-Haul trailer to the new and learning. Speaking of learning, here is what I learned today:
1. You can’t pitchpole a tandem bike unless you really try. And I mean really try. Like being off the bike, lifting the back and flipping it over just for giggles.
2. However, you can generate enough momentum that just stopping is challenging. And if you crash spectacularly enough, does it matter so much how it happened?
3. Being the stoker, you have to be willing to eat whatever the captain is carrying on his back. In today’s case, I got to munch on yellow windbreaker with a side of very fresh lash cords.
4. If you are going to fall over, it will be into a cactus.
5. No matter how hard you look, because of the laws that govern matter, the stoker will never be able to see THROUGH the captain. I tried. I tried HARD. Because of this, you will never truly know when the next rock, tree, root, ditch, toddler, car or cliff will be under your bum. Let’s just say I must have been a VERY bad girl today.
6. It’s very important to have a mutual understanding of code words. Words like “up” to grind up over something, “coast” to quit pedaling, “bump” to get out of the seat are vital to not only camaraderie but also to prevention of homicide. Words like “SHIT!” or even more ominous, “oooOOOOaaaahhh!” only serve to pre-horrify the stoker and dramatically increase the probability of mass injury.
7. Whenever you see people in fluorescent orange, assume they are armed and ready to shoot at anything that resembles movement. Two people on a tandem look a lot like a moose (even in Moab) when you’ve already had a six-pack of bud that morning.
We saw some beautiful country. I must admit, I do miss pulling on my running shoes and just GOING. However, if we are going to do some bike-travel, doing it on a dirt road with the man I love is pretty good stuff.
Now we just have to practice!
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